Overwhelm Me

I need to be overwhelmed by God again. It's been so long since I've just been dumbstruck at His foolish goodness.
I need to not be overwhelmed by money. That means realizing that it's not my paycheck that provides for my needs, but God who does that--sometimes through a paycheck.
I need to be overwhelmed by my love for Chicago. For the past few months, it's just been equivocal with stress and worry--because I've had a very stressful and worrisome few months here, but things are turning around. I need to trust that.
I need to be overwhelmed by my need and desire to create. I need to paint more. I need to record more. I need to play guitar more. I need to write more.
I am already overwhelmed by my girlfriend. That base is already covered, and she continues to surprise me every single day of the week.

Mixtape, everyone.
Multitrack Sneakattack, Vol IV: Crossroads; the Original Motion Picture Soundtrack

Life and Its Happenings

I said to Michelle the other day that whenever I'm anticipating something, I always forget to keep in mind that life happens--that is to say, for example, if I'm expecting to have a nice evening with Michelle and Lyndsey and my mom for her birthday, something like the wedding reception from Hell will come and keep me from getting back until midnight (at which time I was greeted by a candlelit dinner in Michelle's garage, further cementing her position as best girlfriend ever).

This weekend, I got sick, leading me to spend much less time at Bethel as I would have liked, and much more time wrapped in a blanket eating soup (homemade soup, at that). Ah, well. Michelle took care of me, and even though I had to call in to work today, I should be feeling better by tomorrow. The sickness has been progressing, so I know that my body is doing what it's supposed to.

Right now, there isn't really too much I can think to say, except that:
I wish Bekah and I could have seen eachother again under happier circumstances
I'm praying for the Cunninghams & friends

Michelle is a very good person to have taking care of you if you're sick


I missed last week's mixtape.

So here it is.
Multitrack Sneak Attack, Vol. 3: How to Win Friends and Influence People

Ch-ch-ch-changes

My new work schedule is taking some getting used to. I've been used to going to bed around two or three and waking up around noon. Not so, says Brain Hurricane. Now, I have to wake up in time to be at the school by seven forty-five. Eesh. And then, I hang out with my fellow recruiters, give kids pencils and high fives, and talk to parents about the program. Then an hour after school has started, I walk home, wait four hours, and go back to school before it gets out to do it again. Then the rest of my night is mine--until I go to bed around eleven. I don't mind it, though. The kids are great, and I can't wait to start tutoring.

Also great: Michelle Ferris.
Also can't wait: to see her tomorrow.

Bam.

I start work tomorrow. Awesome.

Thank you, Lord, for your provision.

Multitrack Sneakattack, Vol 2: Electric Buggaloo

Alright, everyone. It's that time of week again...
The weekly mixtape.

This one is a bit more eclectic than the last--not too often do you find both the folk of The Tallest Man on Earth and the experimental trip-hop of Portishead on the same playlist, but I was in an eclectic mood.
Like last time, download the zip file and then expand it and open the files in iTunes, create a new playlist, and drag the songs in according to the order in the text document.

For your consideration,
Multitrack Sneakattack, Vol 2: Electric Buggaloo

I love you all.


Tomorrow, we're catering the Pagan Pride Festival here in Chicago. Yeah. Weird.

Also, I got a job. I'm working for a tutoring company called Brain Hurricane. I start recruiting on Tuesday. Tutoring starts in mid October.
Thank you, Jesus.

Doubts and Answers

I've been very worried lately. I took a walk around town last night and just watched listened--someone was playing saxophone inside of their apartment with a window open, an incredibly talented latino band was playing in a yard filling the street with guitar solos, a child hung from a tree branch and told an older girl, 'help! I can't hold on!' and so much more--but I was still crushed by the tension between the present and the future and the crushing fact that I'm living in the city without a steady income, feeling like I'm just taking up an apartment. And I walked through town listening to all of the life going on around me, so crushed by my worries that I had to start singing a simple chorus to myself to keep from being completely discouraged:
'Jesus blood never failed me yet
never failed me yet
Jesus blood never failed me yet.
This one thing I know,
for He loves me so'

I got back to my apartment and checked my email. I got an email from a tutoring company called Brain Hurricane that I had applied for online saying that I seemed like a good fit. Now, I had to schedule an 'audition' (basically an informational meeting and an interview). There happened to be three separate audition times the next day (that's today). I signed up for the one at noon.
Laying down to sleep, I just broke. 'Daddy, I'm scared,' I said (I can't remember the last time I called God that). 'Remember when you guys were looking for an apartment, and the most promising one didn't work, and you told Kriss that you knew I had an apartment waiting?'
Well, yeah...

'Don't you think I'd have a job waiting for you too?'

And then, I just started laughing.
I'm learning to trust, ever so slowly.

p.s. the interview went very well. Now I just have to wait for them to get back to me.

The List

Things I need to work on:

being a servant
not being so selfish
not worrying so much
actually spending time with Jesus and not just reading the Bible
living in the present
hardcore job hunting. Like...ten apps a week or something crazy like that.
not being so lazy
coming to grips with my problems with the words 'surrender' and 'obedience'
finding God in everything--even my roommates' cats.