I'm eternally grateful that I am easily contented, and that things like fedoras and vests and ties can keep me happy for indefinite periods of time. I think it's my own way of returning to the 'good old days' when class and politeness were required of every decent person. And, everyone knows I love old movies, and this fedora makes me feel like I'm inside of one.
The Gospel is constantly being revealed to me in new, more meaningful ways. Even when I understood it for the first time, I didn't understand that it was the only important thing. Everything else in the Church and in life (worship style, preaching, marriage, family, art, poetry) is important because of the Gospel of Jesus.
Redeemer has been praying for five people to come to Christ this year. I'm praying for fifty, whether throughout the year or just while I'm here. A deficiency of hope makes me think throughout the year might even be pushing it, but I'm learning that there's always every kind of hope in Christ.
Brown City is a month and a week away. I can't wait to see how God is going to top my tenure here. And then how He's going to top that, and how He's going to top that, and that, and that...
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
The Port Huron Chronicles
I went to Port Huron this weekend. I'm taken such good care of in that town.
It started with a long, jittery day that ended with a wedding rehearsal. I drank two cups of coffee and shouldn't have, because that was half of the jitters. When I finally left, I took 69 instead of 94, which took me a whole hour out of the way. I stopped at a rest stop to see a map to see just how far out of my way I was, and in the process locked my keys in my car. I called 911, they called a wrecking crew, I called my parents, my mom footed the bill. I'm so thankful for parents that help me get out of jams, even when I put myself in them.
Once there, I spent much time with dears Nathaniel, Chelsie, Brittany, Brenden, and Chelsea & her family. I laughed a lot, watched a lot of Batman, was read to by a five year old, got a fedora finally, joined a drum circle, got into the newspaper, ate pie, cut the impeccable hair of Matthew Henion, and sat on a back porch looking at a river with excellent company. Also, I was blessed by Mr. Paul Henion with a brilliant tape deck, for which I am very grateful. The man also makes a fierce apple pie.
On the way back, I took 94, and it took me a grand total of fifty minutes to get back.
Let it be said that for me, fifty minutes is not a road trip. It's a drive up the block. Port Huron has never been so good to me as when it's this close. I'm going back home.
Today in church, one of our elders (who has a heart condition) collapsed into the pew while we were singing. He took a nitro and was taken to the hospital for tests, and he was fine--but it's still scary. I thought I was going to see a man die before my very eyes. Thank the Lord that his time hasn't come.
There's a lot I'm still afraid of. I look at my incredible blunder in getting to Port Huron, and it's so typically nathaniel. I very rarely do anything right. The only reason the Wednesday night service went well is because I listened to what Jesus told me and told them, and then because other people did most of the talking. I'm not very good at public speaking, I know that full well. I got a D in my speech class, and the only speech I did well on was the manuscript, which was my least favorite. I JUST last week understood the exclusive importance of the Gospel, and it was only because I sat still to listen to Jesus for twenty minutes. Since then, I have had such a hard time being still and listening.
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
It started with a long, jittery day that ended with a wedding rehearsal. I drank two cups of coffee and shouldn't have, because that was half of the jitters. When I finally left, I took 69 instead of 94, which took me a whole hour out of the way. I stopped at a rest stop to see a map to see just how far out of my way I was, and in the process locked my keys in my car. I called 911, they called a wrecking crew, I called my parents, my mom footed the bill. I'm so thankful for parents that help me get out of jams, even when I put myself in them.
Once there, I spent much time with dears Nathaniel, Chelsie, Brittany, Brenden, and Chelsea & her family. I laughed a lot, watched a lot of Batman, was read to by a five year old, got a fedora finally, joined a drum circle, got into the newspaper, ate pie, cut the impeccable hair of Matthew Henion, and sat on a back porch looking at a river with excellent company. Also, I was blessed by Mr. Paul Henion with a brilliant tape deck, for which I am very grateful. The man also makes a fierce apple pie.
On the way back, I took 94, and it took me a grand total of fifty minutes to get back.
Let it be said that for me, fifty minutes is not a road trip. It's a drive up the block. Port Huron has never been so good to me as when it's this close. I'm going back home.
Today in church, one of our elders (who has a heart condition) collapsed into the pew while we were singing. He took a nitro and was taken to the hospital for tests, and he was fine--but it's still scary. I thought I was going to see a man die before my very eyes. Thank the Lord that his time hasn't come.
There's a lot I'm still afraid of. I look at my incredible blunder in getting to Port Huron, and it's so typically nathaniel. I very rarely do anything right. The only reason the Wednesday night service went well is because I listened to what Jesus told me and told them, and then because other people did most of the talking. I'm not very good at public speaking, I know that full well. I got a D in my speech class, and the only speech I did well on was the manuscript, which was my least favorite. I JUST last week understood the exclusive importance of the Gospel, and it was only because I sat still to listen to Jesus for twenty minutes. Since then, I have had such a hard time being still and listening.
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
The Hope of things to Come
Tonight, I led the adult Bible study. The subject of the study was evangelism, and it was supposed to last about half an hour, then have prayer time.
We went about an hour, then started a prayer list of people we would like to see come to know Jesus.
It was very encouraging. I was very nervous about it at first, and half-expected to be met with hostility, but things are rarely ever as bad as we imagine them. Afterward, I started talking with Michael, one of the trustees, who I actually stayed with at 3DYC (who knew? Well...he did). We just started talking about random things, and then got back to the Gospel, and before I knew it, over an hour had passed.
We went to a bonfire at some congregation members' house, and a man Anthony, who was one of the more involved in the dialog in the Bible study, continued the conversation started with the study. I met two girls that are friends of Cody, and then the host's neighbor, who is a professional bowler. I very much enjoy meeting as many people as I am.
Something came to me today.
Christ isn't standing at our pulpits asking, 'who will come in?' Christ is standing at the door looking in crying, 'who will go out?'
I've been worried so much about filling the pews--what I really should be worrying about is emptying them.
God's up to something, tho. That much is for sure.
We went about an hour, then started a prayer list of people we would like to see come to know Jesus.
It was very encouraging. I was very nervous about it at first, and half-expected to be met with hostility, but things are rarely ever as bad as we imagine them. Afterward, I started talking with Michael, one of the trustees, who I actually stayed with at 3DYC (who knew? Well...he did). We just started talking about random things, and then got back to the Gospel, and before I knew it, over an hour had passed.
We went to a bonfire at some congregation members' house, and a man Anthony, who was one of the more involved in the dialog in the Bible study, continued the conversation started with the study. I met two girls that are friends of Cody, and then the host's neighbor, who is a professional bowler. I very much enjoy meeting as many people as I am.
Something came to me today.
Christ isn't standing at our pulpits asking, 'who will come in?' Christ is standing at the door looking in crying, 'who will go out?'
I've been worried so much about filling the pews--what I really should be worrying about is emptying them.
God's up to something, tho. That much is for sure.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
I will eat your soul.
Yesterday, I was the only one in the office all day. Almost as soon as I got into the church, this hunger washed over me--a hunger to see the lost come to Christ. I read through the Sermon on the Mount, and nearly wept at every word Jesus said. I went through the pews praying that they would be filled.
And my heart broke when I thought that the people liked their elbow room and the fact that they don't have to remember any new names.
I spent most of the day looking through D. L. Moody quotes trying to find something on the urgency of evangelism. I did a lot of that today, too. Following is a collection of quotes that struck me and wouldn't let go.
Some of them hurt very badly.
'A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian... and most of all, his family ought to know. '
'There are many of us that are willing to do great things for the Lord, but few of us are willing to do little things. '
'We are told to let our light shine, and if it does, we won't need to tell anybody it does. Lighthouses don't fire cannons to call attention to their shining- they just shine. '
' Now, there are three kinds of joy; there is the joy of one's own salvation. I thought, when I first tasted that, it was the most delicious joy I had ever known, and that I could never get beyond it. But I found, afterward, there was something more joyful that, namely, the joy of the salvation of others.'
'God sent Moses down to Egypt to bring 3,000,000 people out of bondage. The idea would have seemed absurd to most people. Fancy a man with an impediment in his speech, without an army, without Generals, with no record, bringing 3,000,000 people from the power of a great nation like that of the Egyptians. But God sent him, and what was the result? Pharaoh said they should not go, and the great king and all his army were going to prevent them. But did he succeed? God sent Moses and he didn't fail.'
'Now is a time of mercy. It may be I am talking to someone whose days of grace may be few, to someone who may be snatched away very soon, who may never hear another gospel sermon, who may be hearing the last call. My friend, be wise! Make up your mind that you will seek the kingdom of God now. "Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.'
'I know the Bible is inspired because it inspires me'
'Character is what a man is in the dark.'
'If your Gospel isn't touching others, it hasn't touched you!' - Curry R. Blake
'Sympathy is no substitute for action.' - David Livingstone
'No one has the right to hear the gospel twice, while there remains someone who has not heard it once.' - Oswald J. Smith
'Missionary zeal does not grow out of intellectual beliefs, nor out of theological arguments, but out of love.' - Roland Allen
''Not called!' did you say? 'Not heard the call,' I think you should say. Put your ear down to the Bible, and hear Him bid you go and pull sinners out of the fire of sin. Put your ear down to the burdened, agonized heart of humanity, and listen to its pitiful wail for help. Go stand by the gates of hell, and hear the damned entreat you to go to their father's house and bid their brothers and sisters and servants and masters not to come there. Then look Christ in the face -- whose mercy you have professed to obey -- and tell Him whether you will join heart and soul and body and circumstances in the march to publish His mercy to the world.' - William Booth
'As a large fire begins with kindling of small twigs and branches, even so a large revival is preceded by the prayers of a few hidden seemingly insignificant souls. ' - Gary Amirault
'Missions is not the ultimate goal of the church. Worship is. Missions exists because worship doesn't. ' - John Piper
'If sinners be dammed, at least let them leap to Hell over our bodies. If they will perish, let them perish with our arms about their knees. Let no one GO there UNWARNED and UNPRAYED for.' - Charles Spurgeon
'Some want to live within the sound of church or chapel bell; I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of hell.' - C. T. Studd
'Those were great days, and great victories were won. We always managed a riot or a revival. Sometimes a riot and no revival, but never a revival without a riot.' - William Nicholson
'If Jesus had preached the same message that ministers preach today, He would never have been crucified.' - Leonard Ravenhill (OUCH)
'A foolish physician he is, and a most unfaithful friend, that will let a sick man die for fear of troubling him; and cruel wretches are we to our friends, that will rather suffer them to go quietly to hell, then we will anger them, or hazard our reputation with them.' - Richard Baxter
Discuss, comment, react, add. I don't know if we could ever list enough quotes on this topic. It is the absolute pinnacle of importance.
And my heart broke when I thought that the people liked their elbow room and the fact that they don't have to remember any new names.
I spent most of the day looking through D. L. Moody quotes trying to find something on the urgency of evangelism. I did a lot of that today, too. Following is a collection of quotes that struck me and wouldn't let go.
Some of them hurt very badly.
'A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian... and most of all, his family ought to know. '
'There are many of us that are willing to do great things for the Lord, but few of us are willing to do little things. '
'We are told to let our light shine, and if it does, we won't need to tell anybody it does. Lighthouses don't fire cannons to call attention to their shining- they just shine. '
' Now, there are three kinds of joy; there is the joy of one's own salvation. I thought, when I first tasted that, it was the most delicious joy I had ever known, and that I could never get beyond it. But I found, afterward, there was something more joyful that, namely, the joy of the salvation of others.'
'God sent Moses down to Egypt to bring 3,000,000 people out of bondage. The idea would have seemed absurd to most people. Fancy a man with an impediment in his speech, without an army, without Generals, with no record, bringing 3,000,000 people from the power of a great nation like that of the Egyptians. But God sent him, and what was the result? Pharaoh said they should not go, and the great king and all his army were going to prevent them. But did he succeed? God sent Moses and he didn't fail.'
'Now is a time of mercy. It may be I am talking to someone whose days of grace may be few, to someone who may be snatched away very soon, who may never hear another gospel sermon, who may be hearing the last call. My friend, be wise! Make up your mind that you will seek the kingdom of God now. "Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.'
'I know the Bible is inspired because it inspires me'
'Character is what a man is in the dark.'
'If your Gospel isn't touching others, it hasn't touched you!' - Curry R. Blake
'Sympathy is no substitute for action.' - David Livingstone
'No one has the right to hear the gospel twice, while there remains someone who has not heard it once.' - Oswald J. Smith
'Missionary zeal does not grow out of intellectual beliefs, nor out of theological arguments, but out of love.' - Roland Allen
''Not called!' did you say? 'Not heard the call,' I think you should say. Put your ear down to the Bible, and hear Him bid you go and pull sinners out of the fire of sin. Put your ear down to the burdened, agonized heart of humanity, and listen to its pitiful wail for help. Go stand by the gates of hell, and hear the damned entreat you to go to their father's house and bid their brothers and sisters and servants and masters not to come there. Then look Christ in the face -- whose mercy you have professed to obey -- and tell Him whether you will join heart and soul and body and circumstances in the march to publish His mercy to the world.' - William Booth
'As a large fire begins with kindling of small twigs and branches, even so a large revival is preceded by the prayers of a few hidden seemingly insignificant souls. ' - Gary Amirault
'Missions is not the ultimate goal of the church. Worship is. Missions exists because worship doesn't. ' - John Piper
'If sinners be dammed, at least let them leap to Hell over our bodies. If they will perish, let them perish with our arms about their knees. Let no one GO there UNWARNED and UNPRAYED for.' - Charles Spurgeon
'Some want to live within the sound of church or chapel bell; I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of hell.' - C. T. Studd
'Those were great days, and great victories were won. We always managed a riot or a revival. Sometimes a riot and no revival, but never a revival without a riot.' - William Nicholson
'If Jesus had preached the same message that ministers preach today, He would never have been crucified.' - Leonard Ravenhill (OUCH)
'A foolish physician he is, and a most unfaithful friend, that will let a sick man die for fear of troubling him; and cruel wretches are we to our friends, that will rather suffer them to go quietly to hell, then we will anger them, or hazard our reputation with them.' - Richard Baxter
Discuss, comment, react, add. I don't know if we could ever list enough quotes on this topic. It is the absolute pinnacle of importance.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
I can ride a bike with no handlebars
Tomorrow is my first Sunday at Redeemer Missionary Church. I've had a stretching first week, and it's been absolutely wonderful.
I arrived Monday afternoon around two o clock and spent some time with my pastor and his sixteen year old daughter Krista, then my friend Cody showed up and he joined the mix. A little later, my hosts came over for dinner. I am staying with a woman named Carolyn who teaches a Sunday school class and her sons Matthew (eight), Brian (eighteen), and Dan, who is getting married and moving out next Friday. This family is incredible. Carolyn bends over backwards to accommodate every possible need I might have, even to the point of offering to sleep in the sleeper sofa so I can sleep in her room where I won't be woken in the morning by the three golden retrievers in the house.
I have an enormous debt to hospitality.
There was supposed to be wireless internet in my office, but I have been completely unable to figure out how it works. So instead of spending all day on Facebook, I've been writing out prayer lists, reading the Word, and just listening. I'm wasting so much less time, and I love it.
Wednesday, Cody and I went to Salvation Army, where I met his uncle Chris, who pointed out a Fisher Price record player (which actually plays records, for the record) for nine dollars. Later that night, Chris invited me to his house around ten o clock. We sat in his garage for about an hour talking about just about everything.
I'm very excited about what God is going to do here and in me, because I know that it's going to leave me absolutely stunned. I get the feeling that the people in the church don't exactly know how to take me. They just don't really understand things I do--like how I'm always overdressed for instance. It'll pass, though.
Jon and Jess got married today. They're an absolutely beautiful couple. And to think that I thought they were just stupid kids thinking the other was hot the first time I met them.
I love it when I'm wrong.
I arrived Monday afternoon around two o clock and spent some time with my pastor and his sixteen year old daughter Krista, then my friend Cody showed up and he joined the mix. A little later, my hosts came over for dinner. I am staying with a woman named Carolyn who teaches a Sunday school class and her sons Matthew (eight), Brian (eighteen), and Dan, who is getting married and moving out next Friday. This family is incredible. Carolyn bends over backwards to accommodate every possible need I might have, even to the point of offering to sleep in the sleeper sofa so I can sleep in her room where I won't be woken in the morning by the three golden retrievers in the house.
I have an enormous debt to hospitality.
There was supposed to be wireless internet in my office, but I have been completely unable to figure out how it works. So instead of spending all day on Facebook, I've been writing out prayer lists, reading the Word, and just listening. I'm wasting so much less time, and I love it.
Wednesday, Cody and I went to Salvation Army, where I met his uncle Chris, who pointed out a Fisher Price record player (which actually plays records, for the record) for nine dollars. Later that night, Chris invited me to his house around ten o clock. We sat in his garage for about an hour talking about just about everything.
I'm very excited about what God is going to do here and in me, because I know that it's going to leave me absolutely stunned. I get the feeling that the people in the church don't exactly know how to take me. They just don't really understand things I do--like how I'm always overdressed for instance. It'll pass, though.
Jon and Jess got married today. They're an absolutely beautiful couple. And to think that I thought they were just stupid kids thinking the other was hot the first time I met them.
I love it when I'm wrong.
Friday, June 6, 2008
In my place, that's all.
Today was my last day of work. It went by at a very not-rapid pace. I didn't work as hard as I would like to be able to say I did. But regardless, my time there is finished.
This is my last weekend at home, and then I leave Monday morning for Utica.
I started packing up all of my clothes Tuesday night after I wrote that last post. Later that night, I went to get gas, and on the five minute drive back, I just ached because I wanted to be gone already. It's just part of the dichotomy that is myself. I get so nervous about going somewhere, and then I wish I was there.
Soon enough, tho.
I saw Horton Hears a Who tonight. That film is seriously incredible.
There's a part where all of Whoville, who has been skeptical of the Mayor's claim of Horton's existence, is gathered in the town square, and they hear Horton's voice through the drainpipe. The Mayor says, 'Horton! We're all here, and we all believe in you!'
I cried and turned to Him and said, 'Why can't it be that easy?'
On the way back home, the sky with its heavy sacks of rain freshly emptied looked bigger than ever. He said to me, 'I try to make it as easy as I can.'
Some people have just made up their mind, and they are faithful to their own decision.
I want to look like a lunatic, just like that Mayor as he claims that a giant elephant in the sky is doing all he can to keep their city on a flower safe. I want to help Him in bringing people to know Him. I don't want to tell people want to do. I want to show them who loves them.
And that's all.
This is my last weekend at home, and then I leave Monday morning for Utica.
I started packing up all of my clothes Tuesday night after I wrote that last post. Later that night, I went to get gas, and on the five minute drive back, I just ached because I wanted to be gone already. It's just part of the dichotomy that is myself. I get so nervous about going somewhere, and then I wish I was there.
Soon enough, tho.
I saw Horton Hears a Who tonight. That film is seriously incredible.
There's a part where all of Whoville, who has been skeptical of the Mayor's claim of Horton's existence, is gathered in the town square, and they hear Horton's voice through the drainpipe. The Mayor says, 'Horton! We're all here, and we all believe in you!'
I cried and turned to Him and said, 'Why can't it be that easy?'
On the way back home, the sky with its heavy sacks of rain freshly emptied looked bigger than ever. He said to me, 'I try to make it as easy as I can.'
Some people have just made up their mind, and they are faithful to their own decision.
I want to look like a lunatic, just like that Mayor as he claims that a giant elephant in the sky is doing all he can to keep their city on a flower safe. I want to help Him in bringing people to know Him. I don't want to tell people want to do. I want to show them who loves them.
And that's all.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
There's always this great nervous in my spirit every time I approach the verge of something huge in my life, like the emo Peter Pan crisis I had while packing up for college for the first time. And here I am, five and a half days away from my departure for Utica, Michigan to embark on a brave new adventure that is my internship under Reverend Tim Patch at Redeemer Missionary Church--and I haven't started packing.
At all.
I think a lot of it is just compensation for my nervousness. I don't want to be as nervous as I am, so I keep telling myself that it's still far away. That way, I might have some time to prepare myself.
'Nathaniel--five days,' I tell myself.
(sigh)
I almost can't believe it's actually happening. I was reading the email with the final details today, and I was imagining what it might be like, and I heard this voice say,
'There's time to turn back.'
Only...there isn't. I mean in all actuality, I can physically not leave and just keep working maintenance. But at what cost? Whatever I'm going to find up there, Jesus has been preparing it for me for an awfully long time. Even longer than late December when I first talked to Tim about it. And I can't sacrifice that.
I think I might actually be more excited about visiting Port Huron on the weekends than the actual internship. That's because visiting people I love is fun. I love it. I look forward to it.
This internship is just scary. I'm so absolutely scared.
But...
It's just Trust, Trust, Trust, isn't it?
I will follow You to whatever end.
I must go. I have to pack.
At all.
I think a lot of it is just compensation for my nervousness. I don't want to be as nervous as I am, so I keep telling myself that it's still far away. That way, I might have some time to prepare myself.
'Nathaniel--five days,' I tell myself.
(sigh)
I almost can't believe it's actually happening. I was reading the email with the final details today, and I was imagining what it might be like, and I heard this voice say,
'There's time to turn back.'
Only...there isn't. I mean in all actuality, I can physically not leave and just keep working maintenance. But at what cost? Whatever I'm going to find up there, Jesus has been preparing it for me for an awfully long time. Even longer than late December when I first talked to Tim about it. And I can't sacrifice that.
I think I might actually be more excited about visiting Port Huron on the weekends than the actual internship. That's because visiting people I love is fun. I love it. I look forward to it.
This internship is just scary. I'm so absolutely scared.
But...
It's just Trust, Trust, Trust, isn't it?
I will follow You to whatever end.
I must go. I have to pack.
Monday, June 2, 2008
No Such Thing as a Wasted Day
I woke up this morning feeling as if I would throw up. I then went into the bathroom and was right. So, I called my boss and left him a message telling him I wasn't coming in.
There's something so refreshing about having a legitimate excuse to do next to nothing. I get to sit around all day without feeling guilty about it. I get to watch old movies (Dracula, the Wolf-Man, Ed Wood--which isn't that old, but it is in black and white) without thinking that there's something else I should be worried about doing. I get to eat soup. And everyone knows how much I love soup.
Also, today I was alone and doing nothing, and I wasn't up to my usual tricks.
With as much as I want purity, it's so good to see that I've been blessed with some success. And I intend to reap this success to completion.
Also, I want to make a movie that looks and sounds like it was filmed in the forties--a movie that looks like Casablanca or the Maltese Falcon, with suspense and romance and witty dialog and one-liners that will last for generations.
Now if I could just find (or write) a script...
There's something so refreshing about having a legitimate excuse to do next to nothing. I get to sit around all day without feeling guilty about it. I get to watch old movies (Dracula, the Wolf-Man, Ed Wood--which isn't that old, but it is in black and white) without thinking that there's something else I should be worried about doing. I get to eat soup. And everyone knows how much I love soup.
Also, today I was alone and doing nothing, and I wasn't up to my usual tricks.
With as much as I want purity, it's so good to see that I've been blessed with some success. And I intend to reap this success to completion.
Also, I want to make a movie that looks and sounds like it was filmed in the forties--a movie that looks like Casablanca or the Maltese Falcon, with suspense and romance and witty dialog and one-liners that will last for generations.
Now if I could just find (or write) a script...
Sunday, June 1, 2008
The Walking Wounded
There is a war in our culture.
I don't mean a physical war with guns and grenades, nor do I necessarily mean a spiritual war. I mean a war of sex.
Half-nude images are fired from shop windows. Provocative words are dropped from radio stations, throwing shrapnel in all directions. The television is filled with pro-sex propaganda, and the internet taps into every form of communication we have and brings the enemy to us.
On every side, there are casualties. We know their faces. They are brothers, fathers, husbands, neighbors, teachers, architects, doctors, librarians, lawyers, pastors. Churches have been rocked by scandal. Marriages have been torn apart. Children have been alienated. Some children have been denied their first breath. Men of every age, race, and class have been absolutely saturated by the lust. And if the attack on men weren't enough, our sisters and daughters are naively indoctrinated into the ranks of the enemy, learning provocativeness and seduction. Often, even those that would fight the indoctrination don't realize how deeply it goes, and still unknowingly give a foothold. If only their fighting men would help them understand that depth, they might be able to hold fast--but the culture has taught us such things are 'taboo.'
Friends, I am among the walking wounded. I have not been completely overtaken by this enemy, but I have been struck hard and weakened. I often fear that I may be brought down and added to the piles of bodies lining our sidewalks and broken pews. My mind is covered with a layer of filth so deep that I (literally) jerk to the side when I close my eyes.
I do not want this (that goes without saying, but I say it anyway). I was once a warrior on the side of purity; wounded or otherwise, I still fought bravely instead of letting the attack roll over me. I want to fight with that same bravery. At times, I am completely hopeless that I can ever fight with the fervor I desire. But, I know at least one person that fights the way I want to, so it has to be possible.
I want a reputation of purity, but it's so far from me.
I need a Medic, Lord.
Proclaim this among the nations:
Prepare for war!
Rouse the warriors!
Let all the fighting men draw near and attack.
I don't mean a physical war with guns and grenades, nor do I necessarily mean a spiritual war. I mean a war of sex.
Half-nude images are fired from shop windows. Provocative words are dropped from radio stations, throwing shrapnel in all directions. The television is filled with pro-sex propaganda, and the internet taps into every form of communication we have and brings the enemy to us.
On every side, there are casualties. We know their faces. They are brothers, fathers, husbands, neighbors, teachers, architects, doctors, librarians, lawyers, pastors. Churches have been rocked by scandal. Marriages have been torn apart. Children have been alienated. Some children have been denied their first breath. Men of every age, race, and class have been absolutely saturated by the lust. And if the attack on men weren't enough, our sisters and daughters are naively indoctrinated into the ranks of the enemy, learning provocativeness and seduction. Often, even those that would fight the indoctrination don't realize how deeply it goes, and still unknowingly give a foothold. If only their fighting men would help them understand that depth, they might be able to hold fast--but the culture has taught us such things are 'taboo.'
Friends, I am among the walking wounded. I have not been completely overtaken by this enemy, but I have been struck hard and weakened. I often fear that I may be brought down and added to the piles of bodies lining our sidewalks and broken pews. My mind is covered with a layer of filth so deep that I (literally) jerk to the side when I close my eyes.
I do not want this (that goes without saying, but I say it anyway). I was once a warrior on the side of purity; wounded or otherwise, I still fought bravely instead of letting the attack roll over me. I want to fight with that same bravery. At times, I am completely hopeless that I can ever fight with the fervor I desire. But, I know at least one person that fights the way I want to, so it has to be possible.
I want a reputation of purity, but it's so far from me.
I need a Medic, Lord.
Proclaim this among the nations:
Prepare for war!
Rouse the warriors!
Let all the fighting men draw near and attack.
Beat your plowshares into swords
and your pruning hooks into spears.
Let the weakling say,
"I am strong!"
Come quickly, all you nations from every side,
and assemble there.
Bring down your warriors, O LORD!
Joel 3:9-11
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