Thoughts on Humility.

My blog seems to be growing in readership. People I do not know in person are now following my blog. Does it bother me? Nah. That's kind of the idea. But it does kind of change my choice of what to put in here? Probably not. I'll most likely be just as too open about myself as I have been.
Dude in Florida and dude in Ohio, hello.
You, blogstalker Chelsea. Hello.
Everyone else, hello.

I've been noticing lately that American Christians seem to have a mistaken perception of humility. I find myself feeling a strange kind of guilt any time I find myself saying that I love Jesus more than anything, or that I want to do do all I can to please Him. Wait a minute, my humility says. You're scum. You might try to love Jesus, but you're so incredibly selfish. Since your first breath, you haven't had a single selfless thought. Your first and greatest interest is yourself, and Jesus and everyone else gets whatever's left over.

But the truth is, I feel obligated to say those things, because if I claim I'm anything other than that, I've slipped into pride, which is the greatest sin of all, for out of it stems every other sin. Lately, I've been feeling like this American-style humility isn't necessarily a very healthy way of looking at things. In fact...it's not healthy at all. It's defeatist.
And more than that, it's a vote of no-confidence in the Lord's power to change a life.

It is true that I've been known myself to be selfish, manipulative, dishonest, a cheat, a slave to lust, and a champion at justifying myself before men. But the thing is, that's who I was before. Christ got a hold of me and created in me a new nature. Have I wandered back into the same prisons I've been freed from? Yes, but it's a growing process. Habits established over 17 years are going to take a long time to break. So yes, I still sin. But am I still a sinner? Yes, but a sinner saved by grace, and that changes everything.

Also, there's this big emphasis in the American mindset about not deserving salvation. Good job, folks. We don't deserve it. And I'm not saying that we're wrong in that. What is wrong is that our focus is on what we deserve (as if we could do anything ourselves to change the state of our souls) instead of our inestimable worth, which is in us simply because of the Image of God within us.

Look me in the eye and listen to me. You are worth the death of Christ.

I've been reading the book of Acts lately, and I keep seeing the same stupid disciples in the Gospels healing the sick, casting out demons, even raising the dead. They understood that they had power. They understood that Christ gave them righteousness, therefore--they are righteous. And they didn't shy away from it--they embraced it.

And they had power.